Dad Playing Pokémon Instead of Experiencing $8,000 Worth Of Disney Magic
ORLANDO, FL — What began as a magical family vacation quickly turned tense Tuesday after a local...
Read More
Category: Theme Parks
Disney Introduces New Lightning Lane Tier with Shocking Discount
“Guests must agree to wear a special MagicBand that delivers random, mildly painful electric shocks while they wait.”
Read More
Hall of Presidents Animatronics Help Out Due to Labor Shortage
MAGIC KINGDOM — With Fourth of July weekend crowds swelling and staffing stretched across the...
Read More
Slip Kyle A Lincoln And He’ll Let You Stay On PeopleMover For Another Lap
MAGIC KINGDOM — Sources inside Tomorrowland have confirmed that guests looking for a second trip...
Read More
Mom’s Favorite EPCOT Pavilion Is Mexico Because Of the Architecture, Ambiance, Definitely Not the Margaritas
“Sometimes I just drop her off here and go do my own thing for the day”
Read More
Disney Reportedly Contracts Elite Buc-ee’s Bathroom Cleaners Ahead of Busy Season
LAKE BUENA VISTA, FL — Walt Disney World has quietly contracted a specialized team of...
Read More
Disney Updates Animal Kingdom Motto To “Itzazu”
The new slogan is a clear nod to the not so former, not-so-convincing “Nahtazu” mantra of yesteryear.
Read More
INVESTIGATIVE REPORT: “Backside of Water” a myth?
“The claim has been determined to be, at best, a joke, and at worst, an ontological crime against liquids.”
Read More
France Pavilion Restaurants Off to Rough Start After Replacing Entire Staff With Rats
“Any time you transition from trained human hospitality professionals to an entirely rat-based culinary workforce, there are going to be some kinks”
Read More
Four-Year-Old Calls Mom’s Bluff After Threatened Trip Home Fails To Materialize
“Witnesses say the boy maintained firm negotiating pressure…”
Read More